“Half-Man Half-Dog Baffles Doctor” was the actual headline. Early 1993, if I had to guess.
One of those grocery store check-out rags not worth the recycled paper unsuitable for lining a birdcage.
Much fun to read nonetheless.
Actual text. Which Wild Dog used in a plea for subscriptions.
Half-Man Half-Dog has baffled scientists who say that he has the genetic makeup of both man and canine in spite of the fact that his mother and father were human – and normal in every way!
“Judging from the many tests that have been conducted to date, his brain would appear to be predominantly human,” said Dr. Cramer.
“On the other hand, he exhibits some canine behavior, including a powerful hunting instinct.
“Like most dogs, he is wary of strangers. But once he gets to know you, he is extremely friendly and loyal.
“He also offers something that most dog owners prize in their pets – unconditional love.”
Looking back, twenty-five years later, reads like a strangely weird, oddly compelling singles ad.
But, hey, that’s just how my mind works.
Grrrrrrrrrr.
Woof.
ACTUAL PHOTO ACCOMPANYING ORIGINAL ARTICLE