{"id":20709,"date":"2018-12-28T02:10:43","date_gmt":"2018-12-28T02:10:43","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.jackdogwelch.com\/?p=20709"},"modified":"2019-06-10T16:33:50","modified_gmt":"2019-06-10T16:33:50","slug":"the-old-man-googled-perfect-woman","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.jackdogwelch.com\/?p=20709","title":{"rendered":"The Old Man Googled &#8216;Perfect Woman&#8217;"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\" style=\"text-align:center\"><strong><em>you boys can keep your virgins give me hot old women in high heels with asses that forgot to get old. &#8211; Charles Bukowski<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-image\"><figure class=\"aligncenter\"><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" src=\"https:\/\/trutheworld.files.wordpress.com\/2015\/03\/guerrilla-girls-gorila.jpg?w=1085\" alt=\"\"\/><\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">The old man googled &#8216;Perfect woman.&#8221;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Just wonderin&#8217;.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">They got her perfect, alright.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Except the tattoo.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Should be his name.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">In Olde English.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">And the socks.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Definitely want sexier socks.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Maybe something in a snagged fish-net.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">And real bullets.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">A full clip.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-embed-youtube wp-block-embed is-type-video is-provider-youtube wp-embed-aspect-16-9 wp-has-aspect-ratio\"><div class=\"wp-block-embed__wrapper\">\n<iframe loading=\"lazy\" title=\"Alabama Shakes - Don&#039;t Wanna Fight (Official Video - Live from Capitol Studio A)\" width=\"500\" height=\"281\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/nin-fiNz50M?feature=oembed\" frameborder=\"0\" allow=\"accelerometer; autoplay; clipboard-write; encrypted-media; gyroscope; picture-in-picture; web-share\" referrerpolicy=\"strict-origin-when-cross-origin\" allowfullscreen><\/iframe>\n<\/div><\/figure>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>you boys can keep your virgins give me hot old women in high heels with asses that forgot to get old. &#8211; Charles Bukowski The old man googled &#8216;Perfect woman.&#8221; Just wonderin&#8217;. They got her perfect, alright. Except the tattoo. Should be his name. In Olde English. And the socks. Definitely want sexier socks. Maybe&#8230;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"nf_dc_page":"","_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[9],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-20709","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-here-i-am"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":3209,"url":"https:\/\/www.jackdogwelch.com\/?p=3209","url_meta":{"origin":20709,"position":0},"title":"And So I Googled Syria","author":"JDW","date":"November 19, 2015","format":false,"excerpt":"And so I googled Syria. Then I googled how to write poetry. Turns out writing poetry is complex Like Marriage or politics or\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 golf or the Middle East. Turns out writing poetry is simple, like marriage or politics or golf or the Middle East. Decided to pull the plug on\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;The Mind Game&quot;","block_context":{"text":"The Mind Game","link":"https:\/\/www.jackdogwelch.com\/?cat=7"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":12405,"url":"https:\/\/www.jackdogwelch.com\/?p=12405","url_meta":{"origin":20709,"position":1},"title":"Key To Regularity: Exercise and Plenty of Fluids","author":"JDW","date":"October 24, 2017","format":false,"excerpt":"Regarding the fitness craze: America has lost its soul; now it's trying to save its body. \u2015\u00a0George Carlin The old man was exhausted.\u00a0 Early is squirrelly.\u00a0 Forced to move up his run an hour or so, due to a happily rare doctor's visit. The old man's routine was his armor.\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Running Free&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Running Free","link":"https:\/\/www.jackdogwelch.com\/?cat=3"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":14654,"url":"https:\/\/www.jackdogwelch.com\/?p=14654","url_meta":{"origin":20709,"position":2},"title":"Happy New Year!!!","author":"JDW","date":"January 1, 2018","format":false,"excerpt":"[T]omorrow is a new day. You shall begin it well & serenely, & with too high a spirit to be cumbered with your old nonsense. This day ... is too dear with its hopes & invitations to waste a moment on the rotten yesterdays. -\u00a0Ralph Waldo Emerson This from Tampa\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Odds &amp; Ends&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Odds &amp; Ends","link":"https:\/\/www.jackdogwelch.com\/?cat=1"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.jackdogwelch.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/01\/image-1.png?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.jackdogwelch.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/01\/image-1.png?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.jackdogwelch.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/01\/image-1.png?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.jackdogwelch.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/01\/image-1.png?resize=700%2C400&ssl=1 2x"},"classes":[]},{"id":27213,"url":"https:\/\/www.jackdogwelch.com\/?p=27213","url_meta":{"origin":20709,"position":3},"title":"I Stood Next To Him (For Dan &#038; Patti)","author":"JDW","date":"November 17, 2019","format":false,"excerpt":"When my soul was in the lost-and-foundYou came along to claim it. - Carole King Running and love slow the aging process. I stood next to him. While he was changing\u00a0his socks,\u00a0 while I chatted\u00a0with John Tracey. I stood next to him. An intense ferociousness\u00a0 I hadn\u2019t seen before. And\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Running Free&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Running Free","link":"https:\/\/www.jackdogwelch.com\/?cat=3"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.jackdogwelch.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/image-2.png?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.jackdogwelch.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/image-2.png?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.jackdogwelch.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/image-2.png?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.jackdogwelch.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/image-2.png?resize=700%2C400&ssl=1 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.jackdogwelch.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/image-2.png?resize=1050%2C600&ssl=1 3x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.jackdogwelch.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/image-2.png?resize=1400%2C800&ssl=1 4x"},"classes":[]},{"id":21165,"url":"https:\/\/www.jackdogwelch.com\/?p=21165","url_meta":{"origin":20709,"position":4},"title":"The Joe Binks Training Method","author":"JDW","date":"January 27, 2019","format":false,"excerpt":"You can get so emotionally invested in the negative stuff that you let it cloud your judgment. - Galen Rupp I googled Joe Binks and one of the images, well, that's it above. Get the sense Joe Binks looked nothing like that. On the outside. On the inside, might just\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Running Free&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Running Free","link":"https:\/\/www.jackdogwelch.com\/?cat=3"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/img.youtube.com\/vi\/CAFcZ_vcbbg\/0.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":48660,"url":"https:\/\/www.jackdogwelch.com\/?p=48660","url_meta":{"origin":20709,"position":5},"title":"2023?  OMG!","author":"JDW","date":"January 1, 2023","format":false,"excerpt":"You would think life couldn't possibly get more bizarre year after year after year after year.\u00a0 Written about weirdness myself for decades now.\u00a0 See\u00a0http:\/\/www.jackdogwelch.com\/?p=1407 Cheek to cheek and socially distant. This material is from 2017. Lost track during the Pandemic, which continues here in MAGA country. Five more dead this\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Odds &amp; Ends&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Odds &amp; Ends","link":"https:\/\/www.jackdogwelch.com\/?cat=1"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.jackdogwelch.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/01\/1668626143519blob-1.png?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.jackdogwelch.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/01\/1668626143519blob-1.png?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.jackdogwelch.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/01\/1668626143519blob-1.png?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.jackdogwelch.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/01\/1668626143519blob-1.png?resize=700%2C400&ssl=1 2x"},"classes":[]}],"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jackdogwelch.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/20709","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jackdogwelch.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jackdogwelch.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jackdogwelch.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jackdogwelch.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=20709"}],"version-history":[{"count":10,"href":"https:\/\/www.jackdogwelch.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/20709\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":23976,"href":"https:\/\/www.jackdogwelch.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/20709\/revisions\/23976"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jackdogwelch.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=20709"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jackdogwelch.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=20709"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jackdogwelch.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=20709"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}